Posted in fed-up, forgiveness, im so over it, life's a game, Tae' by Tanae' A. on April 10, 2008
after a while, when one person is hurt and walked over enough they close up. they shut down, put their heart on lock and vow to never ever trust again. after being lied to, cheated on, messed over, abandoned and left alone a person would understandably chose to give up. how much hurt does one person live thru before they become heartless?? ii never wanted to be that person. ii always said, every time ii got hurt, that ii would pick up the pieces and continue on. ii promised myself that ii would always have a heart and ii would always care but ii lied. ii took the heat, ii got thru it and the finished product was there but someone decided to put the icing on the damn cake a tad bit too soon. so guess what:: im over it. tae’ no longer has a heart. tae’ no longer has feelings. tae’ is a closed book. ii forgave everyone that has ever done me wrong, ever lied, cheated, stole, used, or manipulated…i forgave. but im angry, pissed and just plain enraged…forget about the hurt, hurt went out the door along with my heart…im just plain mad. ii was once the nice lil good girl that was there no matter what, and ii was always the one you called, or the one that gave and broke my damn back for you but no more…im thru loving, im thru helping, im thru being there for anyone so here is my apology. ii say sorry to the ones to come that are true because ii will never open my heart again. in 20 [[and a half]] years ii have seen more hurt than anyone should ever see so the shop is shut down…say what you will, think what you want…but until you walk in my shoes and live thru the hurt i lived thru and do what i have done only to have every good deed unappreciated dont judge me. im a heartless chick and i HATE every cunt that wronged me.