giving up on everything

Posted in [[o8 aint 4 me]] by Tanae' A. on January 14, 2008

i feel like my life is kinda at a dead end and its bothering me. i have a lot of plans for the 08 but its almost the end of January and im worse off then i was before this new year got here. My bank account is blown because it seems like everybody needs money and everytime i try to put something in i end having to take some out. One thing that I cant do is leave people hanging but some people just aint the helpin type and usually when i help ppl i dont expect anything in return. Back in like November I let a friend borrow a lot of money [[like not no 20 or 50 bucks]] and i told her to give it back when she gets back on her feet. So Christmas time rolls around and she callin me tellin me bout all this stuff she bought herself and her roommate and all this other stuff but what happened to my money?? Seems like someone in my fam is always needing money for this or that and I really dont mind giving money to family because if i need it they got me. Today one of my homegirls calls me to ask if I can spot her some change. I AM NOT THE BANK!! I am trying to buy a car, go back to school and get out of debt so i dont have money to be giving ppl left and right. Then I feel like the more I try to do stuff the more ppl come along and harass me about it. IM GOING BACK TO SCHOOL!!! Well at least that was the plan but now im to the point where i dont wanna do shit. I came into the new year wit mad goals, money and a lot of open doors but now it seems like the goals are shot my money is gone and the doors have been slammed in my face so im giving up. I’ll continue being the disappointment that I am cause I aint doing nothing and 08 can kiss my rear end. Seems like every time i try to do something reality comes to bite me in the butt and maybe i really am living in a fantasy world. All the shit that i want out of life aint attainable, maybe for other ppl but not for someone like me. This year aint nothing but another 365 days to get thru and thats what im going to do regardless. I’m tired of gettin ahead only to have life push me back…

[[08 aint 4 me]]


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