false hope

Posted in change, child, decisions, growth, moving on, [[im oh so o8]] by Tanae' A. on January 10, 2008

one thing that i learned growing up is to let go of false hope. as children we tend to hope for things that will never ever come to be and in the end it leaves us disappointed. but i guess somewhere along the line i kinda wised up and let that go. I no longer wish for things that are out of my reach and i especially dont hope for things that i know i’ll never have. If I dont take time out to actually try to get those things that are unattainable i wont be disappointed when i cant get them. somewhere between then and now I grew up a lil bit. While I have grabbed a small piece of that false hope back I really still remain at a reasonable distance. I find myself today hoping and wishing that i could somehow grab hold of the things that are slightly [not completely] out of my reach. needless to say, today i will go back into my childish state. I recently kinda took a big leap and attempted to go after something that i knew i couldn’t have. Maybe I was tripin when I decided to set the bar a bit too high and now I am disappointed. But for once, even tho I am somewhat disappointed in myself, I am moreso disappointed in the other ppl involved. Sometimes in this life we lower our standards and accept what we can get rather than what we deserve and when that happens we change as people. Im usually not one to criticize other people’s actions but stupid is stupid. I realized just now that I am better than the ppl involved simply because i refuse to meet them at the level that they are at. In order to get what I want I would have to lower my standards and i’ll be damned if i compromise my growth just for something that aint even a necessity. i have worked too hard to get to where i am and i aint even bout to trip up over something that just look good from the outside in. I’ll take my loses and let some people go but i’ll remember that im the winner because i walked away. Maybe i’ll give up on the false hope for a while but one thing that i wont give up on is ME

[[im oh so 08]]

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