hiding the hurt

Posted in Uncategorized by Tanae' A. on September 24, 2007

i saw her yesterday and yet again, she looked in my face, rolled her eyes and kept walking like i never even existed. i keep making excuses, well maybe she didn’t see me, or she was in a rush to get back to her seat. i dont know. i know that this is really bothering me tho. how can someone just act like that?? i’ve never done anything to her, never crossed her over or any of that. we’re better than that… or at least i thought so. i guess now i know how people really are. it’s okay tho. i guess we take our wins and expect the loses but its just sad that things have to end this way. i am really hurt right now because someone that i was supposed to be close to is now like at such a distance. i dont understand. am i trippin?? cause maybe she has a reason to be mad. maybe she has a reason to walk past me without even speaking but i thought that if something like this ever happened she would at least be woman enough to come to me and let me know that there was a problem. walking past me like i dont even exist is not the way to do things.

why do i care?? why is this bothering me?? now i wish that i could take bake every single thing that has happened. maybe i should have ignored the email and kept right on with my life. maybe i blew things out of proportion and maybe i should have never went to someone with an issue that would soon die down. maybe i was in the wrong the whole time and nobody wanted to tell me. maybe all of this nonsense and childish play could’ve been avoided if i would’ve just let it go.

i am hurt and i think that i have every right to be hurt. im not mad or angry or the least bit upset, but i am hurt. not only because we were really tight at one point in time but because i looked up to her and it seems like now she is acting like a person that i dont want to look up to. seems like everyone that i look up to has a shady side. i guess you never know people. i just wish that something could be done to undo what i have done. but wishing gets us nowhere and juvenile behaviors surely do die hard.


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