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More than just friends

Posted in differences, friends, frustrations by Tanae' A. on September 5, 2007

There’s this dude that I have been friends with for a few years now. I met him thru my big sister and eventually we just became really cool. About a year ago, we started really talking on a serious level and we actually dated for a few months. Eventually, I broke it off because I felt like I was draggin him along due to the simple fact that I still wanted to be with my honey. Even after we broke up, we still remained really good friends, I talked to him all the time and he texted me all day long and at the end of the day we had so much that we depended on one another for. Truth is tho, for the nine months that we have been seperated we have been trying so hard to hide our feelings from one another. We’ll go weeks without talking and then he’ll call me or i’ll text him and this cycle just keeps on going over and over again. In my heart I know that I will have feelings for him for a long time. I really care about him and have love for him but there are just some things in life that you leave alone and he’s one of them. He’s a bad boy, I’m a good girl. We both have two completely different lifestyles and we just dont mix.. he brings me down and reality of it is… he’s not what I need. But I dont think I can really do without his friendship. I need that phone call every other week asking me how im doing. I need someone to ask me about me and my honey because no one else will. I need that person to talk to about all the things that goes on in life that we dont want to share with even our closest friends and he is that person. He knows more about me than Jazzy will ever know. He knows more about me than my honey will ever know and thats just the type of relationship that we have but deep down inside I regret it because I know that I want to be more than just friends… and that is so unloyal to my love who is stuck in another state for school.

But for a lifetime and a half me and Troy will be friends…

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