money is funny & change is strange

Posted in bills, broke as a joke, debt, frustrations, money by Tanae' A. on August 13, 2007

I have a lot of things on my mind today. There is a lot going on in my life and it’s starting to really stress me out. I dont handle stress well. I’m praying that these issues disappear soon but I know that they wont. Maybe if I tell you all about them, I will feel a little better.

Money is my issue. I cannot stand money at all. I secretly wish everything in the world was five dollars or less. But unfortunately, I owe a lot of people. Well, let me take that back, I dont owe a lot of people, I owe a little bit of people. More like 3 0r 4 people but the point is…. I owe. This is stressing me out because I feel as tho I am working just to pay someone else who is already getting paid to harrass me about a payment. So what am I going to do?? I am going to grit my teeth and pay off all these stupid stupid bills and I will not eat carryout for the next month and that is a hard thing to come to grips with.

Carry out is not really a huge issue because next month I’ll be back up to par on the bill thing… everything will be taken care of but now I’m kinda messed up because all the money that was supposed to be going to the bank is now going to these stupid stupid bill collectors. So how do we solve that problem?? We get a second job. And what do we do with the money from the second job?? We put it in the bank. So where is the money that we get to spend?? THERE IS NONE!!! We dont get to spend any money. We save and we save and work as much as possible and we do what we have to do in order to get ahead.

So why am I so frustrated right now?? I now have to apply for a second job. A second job means that I wont have any time to do things that I want to do. And everything that I want to do consists of spending money because the world is just so daggon expensive. And since I cant do anything that I want to do, I’ll just be in a really crappy mood. But even more than that… I can do the one thing that I want to do which is go back to school… and can anyone guess why?? BECAUSE I DONT HAVE ANY MONEY!! Correct! I am broke, that means that I dont even have money to pay for classes!!! And I cant get financial aid from the school BECAUSE I OWE THEM MONEY…and I cant get aid from the gov’t BECAUSE I OWE THEM MONEY!! So I will have to wait… a whole semester before I can go back to school and do anything with myself.

So, if anybody is wondering what it is that I am doing with my life, please just know that I will be working non-stop just to make a dollar out of fifteen cents. And if anybody out there feels the need to just pray on my behalf it would be greatly appreciated!! LoL!! Really tho.

I want you all to know that it may seem as tho I am complaining… which I am. But I am better than blessed. I have enough money to pay off every single bill that is waiting for me and that may mean that I have to make some sacrifices but I am blessed enough to be able to laugh about something as simple as not having money. I can still afford the simple things that so many people in this world cant afford so trust me when I say that I am completely Thankful to God for even putting me in a position where I am able to pay off all these stupid bills without really having to struggle.

As always… keep praying and never ever stop.


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