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The Worst Father’s Day Ever

I honestly dont think I’ve ever had a bad Father’s Day. Of course, I’ve never really had a father to celebrate but usually my days are spent with my family enjoying their company. Yesterday will be a day that I will never forget, just because it was that terrible.

It started off good. I went to church early to dance, went to sunday school, laughed a lil, got some breakfast, and chilled with my fam. As soon as the 10:45 service started we got word that some people close to us lost their grand-father and from there my day went down hill. I tried my best to be there for them all but it was extremely hard. We all decided to dance anyway and the rest of the church service was spent comforting them and making sure they were okay.

Everytime someone around me loses someone, I feel like I’m just that much closer to losing someone that I love. It scares me to think about death because I dont think I would be able to deal with that type of loss. I think now more than ever, I have the urge to be with my family as much as I possibly can because you never know when some one will be taken from you.

Yesterday was the first Father’s Day that I can remember not being surrounded by all of my aunts uncles and cousins. We went to dinner, just my sister and my mom, and then we went home. It saddens me because I see things changing in my family and I dont want to accept the change. We no longer get together on holidays like we used to. We no longer do something as simple as Sunday dinner like we used to. I just have the feeling that it’s gonna take something terrible in order to get us all back together. We are moving away from each other physically and I have a problem with it. My cousins moved to PA a few months ago. My brother moved to South Carolina in January. My aunt, uncle and cousins just moved to Chicago last week. My Uncle has lived in Atlanta since I can remember, my grandfather is in Ohio. And my other uncle is moving back to Alberquerque, New Mexico in less than two months. What is happening to my family?? Why are we seperating ourselves??

My prayers go out to Mama Na and the entire family. Be strong honeys God is with you and so are we…

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