Free to Grieve

Posted in back to the past, death, family, friends, hurt, life, lost one, love, people I love, prayer, seperation by Tanae' A. on May 15, 2007

Last night I was forced to go back to a time that I didnt want to go back to. Some very important people in my life lost their great-grandmother a few days ago and I was automatically taken back to the summer of 2005. Almost two years ago I lost one of my favorite people in the entire world… My aunt Tee. When she passed, I shed my tears but I had to remain strong for my mom and grandmother who were more hurt than I was. When I think about life and the people that we are going to lose along the way I am reminded how much more growing up I have to do. If I had a choice I would go before my sisters, mother, grandmother, cousins, or aunts go. When I think about living life without the people that mean so much to me I know that is something that I am not prepared to deal with. There are a lot of people in my family that I dont get to see as often as I would like simply because of location or timing but that doesn’t dismiss the fact that without them my life would be totally incomplete. Half my family is stretched all across the country and the more time goes by the more we seperate but I couldn’t possibly be accept the fact that eventually I will lose the people close to me. I pray that in the time that I have left with those in my family that I would not only be able to build wonderful memories but also that I would grow so that when time comes to say farewell to the ones I love I can be strong and continue on with life. I love every single person in my family for the people that they are and the contributions that they make. I hope that my dear friends would allow their hearts to grieve but i also pray that they would find strength to pick up where they left off and appreciate life, family, and friends more because of what they have been forced to endure. I love you guys always… my prayers are with you and the fam.



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  1. Hannah said, on November 19, 2007 at 10:01 pm

    Basically I was just amazed with what i just read because it seemed like I was looking at all of my own thoughts and feelings, written out in front of me. True, everyone is different, but as i read more and more of your thoughts, I saw that we think the exact same way when it comes to life without a dad. I recently actually let go and stopped wishing for a fathers love, and like you, the only thing that saddens me is the thought of walking the aisle-alone.

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